Jenny and Jethro

It was like a fairytale - once upon a time
Paris was a place, we were so crazy in love.
Out of the blue something happened to our love,
I had to leave Paris - we had crossed the line.

I left you for a better job, I chose my head,
beause my heart would have chosen you, always you.
Since that second night in Marseille, I wanted you.
In the end it came down to things you never said.

If you really loved me, you would have said it:
"Jen, my dear, I do love you, please don't ever leave."
I don't know why, but you were unable to feel.
In my heart there still is fire, that once was lit..

There are days, when I wish, I had never met you.
Honey, you never fit into my five-point-plan,
it's not about having kids or finding a man.
I wrote our end in a love letter: "Dear Jethro".

For six years I missed your voice, your silver hair,
in the mornings I wanted you in my bed.
No, Jehtro, you never really left my head.
Trust me, I tried, telling myself I do not care.

I thought "Dear John" letter in Paris was the end
and when director's office was finally mine,
I really thought we were going to be just fine.
But the thought crashed the moment we met again.

Paris flashed in my eyes, I know you saw it too,
but everything had changed - we are not the same.
I saw anger in your eyes, as you said my name.
I replied knowing, I am still not over you.

But somehow we became friends - almost like before -
late dinners and flirting, but not crossing the line.
Explosions and kidnappings - we ran out of time.
Your past came out and you left. You and me - no more.

You returned, when I was finally back on track
I got closer to Benouit, but further from you.
We fought not only about our past, but present too.
But I had to kill him, you already knew that.

After that we were beyond repair - we were done.
Hatred was back in your eyes, when I fought fate.
Will is dead, Svetlana is back - I set the date.
I blinked, tried to keep you safe and then I was gone.

The last thing on my mind, when I was shot, was you.
Hatred became guilt, but I never wanted that.
Now I'm just one of your ghosts, never coming back.
Unfinished letter held words - Jethro I love you..

I wish I had one more day with you in Paris
I wish you had made me stay and I never left.
When you took my heart, it was nothing but a theft.
Tell me what if? Dear Jethro, would we be married?

You never looked at my dead body  so pale and cold.
Now we are in different worlds, but it is fine.
Shannon will always have you, you were never mine.
It breaks my hears as you move on with words untold.

2013/12/05

Unwanted

Unwanted

When she heard your heart beat, I think she felt regret.
She felt like she was cheap and to him you were threat.
From the first breath you took, through the first step you made
to the time you did look - and felt. You are betrayed.

Love did not bring you here - you have been a mistake.
Yes, you will shed some tears, at nights feel too much hate,
your blood never felt love towards you, you love child,
if you could rise above, and just once - you smiled.

You put your hate in words, try to let go this pain,
but everything still hurts. Now you wait for the rain.
You close your eyes and cry, really losing yourself,
once again you ask why this pain is on your shelf..

You are glued to this place and running is not right,
but leave without trace, go through the darkest night,
walk through the dark blue sea, go past the oldest tree,
run until you are free - that you will never be.

Shadow will always come and take away your joy.
You feel like you are numb, because you are destroyed
Mother who wanted him, father who you don't know -
you have been on the brim they told you "no".

They tried to bring you down, took away all you had,
made sure you make no sound as you told you are sad.
In silence you gave your strength, so you can rise again,
plan always at arm's length you try to break the chain.

Every time you look back to the days you were child,
happy thoughts you still lack, but the time you smiled
seems like sunshine in dark cells of your childhood.
Not a walk in a park, but you found something good.

Many years have gone by and your scars are still here,
you just wanna say bye to angry voice you hear.
Honey, you will always be scared and haunted
because since the first day, you have been unwanted.

2014/05/07