Friday, September 26, 2014

She writes love on her arm

She turned seventeen days ago, she's so fragile and sweet,
but in the darkness she felt alone, abandoned and beat.
On the ground she found a piece of glass to cut through the pain.
Girl, who had never felt this love, but she'd never complain,
On the back of her hand she wrote her name just to remind
herself the word stuck in her throat, but lost in her dark mind.

She turned eighteen just days ago, finding strength in her scars,
They say in this year she has grown to like the falling stars - 
She wants to escape and be free, like stars above her head,
Knowing that she will never be like them sitting on sled.
With long sleeves and her mouth kept shut, she hides behind cigars,
when she looks for a place to cut between her healing scars.

So she writes it down
Before she will drown
So she writes it down
Or she will drown

Once again she picks up the knife, 
Ready to give up her whole life.
Looking around she finds no one,
Seeing yet again darkness won.
She writes love on her arms
She writes love on her arms

She turned nineteen just days ago, having a newfound friend, 
and every scar he wants to know so at last he can mend
her broken heart, her broken soul she so carefully broke.
He tries to put her back to whole, breathes in the stuffy smoke,
Silently he gives her his strength - all he has to offer,
And always stays at her arm's length, hoping she won't suffer.

She turned twenty just days ago, finally in new place,
But her healing is still so slow without seeing his face.
Once again she feels so alone just like she did before,
she needs something to call her own, but for now she is sore.
The razor cuts deep through her skin, her blood causing harm,
even her friend so far has been, his name is on her arm.

So she writes it down
Before she will drown
So she writes it down
Or she will drown

Finally she picks up the knife
Ready to give up her whole life
Looking around she finds no one
Seeing yet again darkness won
She writes love on her arms
She writes love on her arms

She turned twenty one days ago, now crying out her heart
'Cause her best friend almost let go, when they were far apart.
At fixing her he was so good, because he was the same,
Alone he did the best he could, at last wrote down her name,
Forever engraved on his skin, he almost lost his life.
But as suicide is a sin, he put down his last knife.

So they write it down
Before they will drown
So they write it down
Or they will drown

Finally he picks up the knife
Ready to give up his whole life
Looking around he finds no one
Seeing yet again darkness won
He writes love on his arms
He writes love on his arms

She will turn twenty two in days, for once she is at ease,
She still feels stuck in her own maze, he is down on his knees.
Begging her to stop, and she did, for him she'd do it all,
If only he'd know how she feels, how long it took to fall,
She is in love, but he won't know - she will never tell him,
She knows she has to let him go, fade sparkle back to dim.

He saved her and destroyed her
He saved her and destroyed her

He won't go just yet
She will pay her debt
He won't go just yet
Some love she will get

Finally she puts down the knife
Ready to live up her whole life
Looking around she finds someone
Seeing for once the light has won
She writes love on his heart
He writes love on her heart

He won't go just yet
She will pay her debt
He won't go just yet
Some love she will get

He saved her and destroyed her
She saved him and destroyed him
He saved her and destroyed her
She saved him and destroyed him

2014/09/26

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Kuid teie mitte...

Taas on mälestused toonud mu siia tagasi,
jälle sammun seda teed, mäletan, kuhu see viib,
mets - me unistuste maa; me ammune silmapiir -
see lagunenud talumaja ja katkine kiik,
vaade lööb südamest läbi kui mürgitatud piik,
sest nüüdseks on kõik mu sõbrad liikunud edasi.
Vaid mina mitte...

Seal kuuskede taga pink, palliplatsi ääres,
kahe puu vahel, sirelite keskel on värav,
kui palli sinna lüüa, meil silm alati säras...
Mäletate veel seda aega, kui olime väiksed,
kui nali, naer ja muretus meie päevi täitsid?
Ja päike vaid meie rõõmuks taevavõlvil veeres...
Ka mina mitte...

Meie unistused lendasid avaras taevas,
terve maailm oli lahti me ees, me mängumaa.
Kuid siis tuli murdepunkt, otsuse tegite taas -
Mina, kui kõige haavatavam lüli, kaotasin kõik,
mu murdsite maha, mu kaotus oli teie võit.
Ka viimne kord kui olime koos, kuulsin teid naermas...
Kuid mina mitte...

Siin hüljatud kohas me kunagine õnn lasub,
kuulsin te uutest sõpradest - paremad kui mina -
ja kõrgel taevas on tagasi see helkiv sina.
Viha, mis juhib mind, muutis mu nii tundetuks siis,
kui ükskord hüljatuna minema ma läksin siit.
Võib-olla teil tagasi tulla mõnikord tasub....
Kuid minul mitte...

Kuid jälle olen tagasi siin, sest tahan tunda
ja puutuda seda õnne, mis on mu minevik,
sest tean, et üksilduses möödub minu tulevik.
Mu rõõmu varjutab hüljatus - lakkamatu nutt,
ometi tean, et see on mu paratamatu hukk -
Olen liiga haavatud, et sellest välja tulla...
Kuid teie mitte...

2014/09/10